Adopting Older Children

Adopting older children can bring deep fulfillment and lasting impact. Many families are drawn to this path, and for good reason. Older children offer unique perspectives shaped by life experience. They often demonstrate resilience, emotional depth, and a clear sense of identity. Although they may have faced hardships, they can thrive in the care of a loving, prepared family.

Why Older Children Wait Longer for Adoption

According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, over 400,000 children are currently in foster care. A significant number of them are over the age of six. These children frequently wait years for a permanent family, often moving through multiple temporary placements. This instability can make it harder for them to feel secure and supported. However, the need for long-term homes remains urgent.

Understanding the Challenges

Adopting an older child isn’t without its difficulties. Many have experienced trauma, neglect, or loss. These past experiences can lead to trust issues or attachment struggles. It’s not uncommon for older adoptees to need therapy, educational support, or structured routines to help them adjust.

Some children may act out or withdraw, especially during the early stages of placement. Behavioral challenges often stem from a history of inconsistency or fear of abandonment. In such cases, patience and consistency are crucial. With time, a supportive environment can help children learn to trust and bond.

The Emotional Rewards

Despite the hurdles, adoptive parents often report that the experience is profoundly rewarding. Older children are often eager for connection. They may already have defined personalities, interests, and opinions. These qualities enrich family life in meaningful ways.

In fact, many adoptive families find joy in seeing their children gain confidence, excel in school, or build healthy friendships. Progress may come in small steps, but each is a victory worth celebrating. As the bond deepens, so does the sense of family.

Preparing for the Journey

Planning is essential. Prospective adoptive parents should educate themselves about trauma-informed care, special education services, and mental health resources. Understanding the child’s history helps create an effective support system.

A structured home environment, clear expectations, and ongoing communication provide the foundation children need to succeed. Support groups and adoption education workshops can also be valuable tools during this transition.

Educational and Behavioral Needs

Older adoptees may face academic struggles. Studies have shown that they often require specialized support, such as tutoring or counseling. Some may have gaps in education or difficulty adapting to traditional classroom settings.

Behaviorally, adoptive parents should be prepared for ups and downs. Consistent routines, open dialogue, and access to therapy can make a big difference. Over time, most children show remarkable growth when given appropriate care and stability.

Medical and Emotional Health

Medical needs can also be more complex. Some children come with chronic health conditions or incomplete medical histories. Establishing care with pediatricians and specialists should be a priority early on.

Emotionally, older adoptees may wrestle with self-esteem or identity questions. Talking openly about adoption, offering reassurance, and encouraging emotional expression help them feel secure and valued.

Cultural Identity and Heritage

Many older children come from diverse cultural backgrounds. Honoring their heritage is essential to helping them feel whole. Adoptive parents can celebrate cultural holidays, learn about traditions, and integrate aspects of the child’s background into daily life.

Respecting a child’s cultural identity fosters belonging and pride. It also shows the child that their story matters—both before and after adoption.

Legal Considerations and Documentation

Adoption involves important legal steps. Parental rights must be terminated, guardianship established, and all documentation completed through the court system. Finalization ensures the child has full legal status as part of the adoptive family.

Older children may have more complex legal histories, such as prior placements or unresolved custody issues. Experienced legal guidance is critical to navigating these challenges effectively.

Navigating the Paperwork

From home studies and financial disclosures to court hearings and post-placement reports, the paperwork can be overwhelming. Having an attorney who understands state adoption laws helps streamline the process.

Every document must be accurate and complete. A small error can cause delays or complications. Legal professionals play a vital role in protecting both the child’s and the family’s best interests.

Building a Long-Term Support System

Adoption doesn’t end with finalization. Ongoing support is key to long-term success. Families often benefit from peer support, mentoring programs, and counseling services. Community resources can offer guidance and reduce the sense of isolation some adoptive families feel.

Education also plays a continuing role. The more families know about trauma, child development, and conflict resolution, the better equipped they are to respond to challenges.

The Power of Stability

Research confirms that stable, loving homes lead to better outcomes for adopted children. They are more likely to succeed academically, form healthy relationships, and develop strong self-esteem. Long-term consistency allows children to heal, grow, and plan for the future.

A Legal Partner You Can Trust

For families considering adoption, especially of older children, legal support is not optional—it’s essential. Each step must be handled with care to ensure your parental rights are secure and the adoption is recognized under state law.

With over 25 years of experience, the Law Office of Cofsky & Zeidman, LLC has helped more than 1,500 families through adoption. Attorney Donald C. Cofsky and his team guide families through agency, private, stepparent, and international adoptions, as well as contested cases. Their support includes managing adoption expenses, completing home studies, and preparing families for court proceedings.

To learn how Cofsky & Zeidman can help your family, contact their office online or call (856) 429-5005 in Haddonfield, (856) 845-2555 in Woodbury, or (215) 563-2150 in Philadelphia. Legal confidence gives families peace of mind—so they can focus on what matters most: building a loving, lasting home.

What You Need to Know about New Jersey’s Adoption Laws

New Jersey Adoption Laws and Regulations

More than a hundred thousand children in foster care were eligible for adoption in the United States as of 2021. Whether you are looking to adopt or wishing to place a child for adoption, there are some things you’ll want to know about adoption laws in New Jersey.

What Are New Jersey’s Adoption Laws?

New Jersey has rules and regulations concerning who can adopt a child. Some of them also protect birth mothers.

Both Parents Have to Agree to the Adoption

In New Jersey, both parents (if a married couple is adopting) need to agree when looking to adopt a child. The reason is simply to ensure the child is wanted. Conversely, both parents need to agree to the adoption when giving up parental rights. The birth mother and father need to consent or waive their right to do so. If a birth father isn’t known, an adoption agency can attempt to contact potential birth fathers. They will communicate with the potential fathers to reduce stress.

When a new baby is born, the birth parents have 72 hours to consider the decision before the adoption can happen. More time can be given if necessary or requested. The purpose here is to make sure both parents wish to give the baby up for adoption.

Adoptive Families Can Help With Birth Expenses

Pregnancy and birth expenses can be covered by the adoptive family if the birth mother does not have the financial resources for such expenses. Adoptive families in New Jersey can cover pregnancy expenses starting in the fourth week. They can also cover birth costs and adoption-related costs as well if the birth mother is unable to do so. This includes legal costs if a New Jersey adoption attorney is involved.

Who Can Adopt in New Jersey?

In New Jersey, adoptive parents must be at least 18 years of age and at least 10 years older than the child they wish to adopt. Also, prospective adoptive parents need to pass a home study. This applies to both in-state adoptions and ones where the adoptive parents are from another state. A home study normally includes:

  • A visit to the adoptive parents’ home
  • Interviews with the adoptive parents
  • A criminal background check
  • Interviews with anyone else who lives in the home
  • Interviews with employers
  • Interviews with character references (which may be done by phone or in person)
  • Proof of income

These requirements apply even if the adoptive parents already have children. These laws are meant to protect the child and give the birth mother added peace of mind. The home study process also includes 27 hours of training for prospective adoptive parents. Topics covered include dealing with loss and handling basic parenting duties or responsibilities.

After a successful home study is completed, the adoptive parents must be approved by the Office of Licensing. This step involves another visit to the home by a license inspector. Approval for adoption normally occurs after a successful license inspection. If the child is not a newborn, they will have a chance to express their feelings about the potential adoption as well if they are old enough to do so. Even if a newborn is requested, it may take time for one to become available through the adoption process since this is a popular request. The state has a database of waiting children who are older and looking to be adopted.

The Adoption Agency May Have Additional Requirements

Adoption agencies in New Jersey may have, for example, an extra screening process or a more detailed one. Some agencies are religion-based, and they may limit their adoptions to traditional married couples. Other agencies are broader when it comes to who can adopt through their agency. Do some checking ahead of time to see what applies to the agencies you are considering.

Learning More About Your Birth Parents

New Jersey makes it easier for adopted children to learn more about their birth parents when they turn 18. Adopted children now have the legal right to obtain their birth certificate. New Jersey has a database for children of adopted parents to find contact information for their parents or birth mother. However, the birth mother has the right to request that they not be contacted by their child. Birth mothers or both parents can change this information if they change their minds later and wish to be contacted.

Contact Cofsky & Zeidman today to talk to a New Jersey adoption attorney for assistance with the adoption process. We have offices in Haddonfield and Woodbury.

The Latest Advances In In Vitro Fertlization

The Latest Innovations in IVF and the Challenges

The science of in vitro fertilization (IVF) continues to progress and increase success rates to above 20%. Still, many New Jersey adoption lawyers note that research could be proceeding at a much faster rate. The problem is that research is limited in the U.S. not only by old legislation but by laws that vary between states.

IVF

IVF involves a series of procedures that can lead to pregnancy. The particular series of procedures employed depends on the individuals involved and the reproductive challenges they face. The first use of IVF was in 1978. By 1991, the success rate was 8 percent. Lab and clinical advancements have increased that success rate to 22% as of 2021.

Slow Rate of Research

IVF was a heavily stigmatized area of reproductive medicine in the 1980s and 1990s. It was also highly politicized, and lawmakers based their opinions on the stigma of the time. That stigma has largely subsided in Western culture. Still, researchers are operating under those laws established more than 30 and 40 years ago. Further complicating matters in the U.S. is that those laws vary from state to state. Embryo research is only explicitly legal in five states and legal subject to limitations in 13 other states, including New Jersey.

Modern Research Shows Promise

Limited access to embryos has shifted much research to the peripheries of IVF. Some studies focus on using nutritional supplements and sound waves, for instance, to activate lethargic sperm rather than the core IVF methodologies. Scientists warn that many of these solutions make it to the marketplace with limited research. Despite that low signal-to-noise ratio, there are notable improvements in the field. One involves using artificial intelligence (AI) to select the embryos most likely to succeed. Another is in vitro gametogenesis (IVG), which can transform normal cells into reproductive cells.

AI

The use of AI to select embryos is among the most exciting frontiers of IVF. Embryo selection is currently a time-consuming and imperfect process that requires a clinical embryologist to make selections based on morphology and their individual experience. There are now AI models that greatly reduce the time required, eliminate subjectivity, and increase success rates. These models can also benefit from the collective experience of all embryologists. One of the core ethical concerns is the “black box” nature of AI and having these models select the embryos that will become children. This is certainly something we will have to work through as a society and create laws to protect against misuse.

IVG

IVG is a process through which scientists can transform somatic or “normal” cells into gametes or reproductive cells. Through IVG, it is possible to create an artificial sperm and an artificial egg and then combine them to create an embryo. It would make it possible for practically all couples to procreate, including same-sex couples. While IVG will be possible eventually, it is still in its early stages. In addition, there are some ethical concerns as well. It does, for example, open up the possibility of creating a child through the unauthorized use of genetic material.

Enhancing Success Rates

There has also been great progress in improving success rates on an individual level. The most important factors include maintaining a moderate body mass index, eating a balanced diet, taking folic acid as a supplement, and regular moderate exercise. Those trying to get pregnant should manage their stress levels. Tobacco and alcohol use is known to lower success rates. IVF experts also recommend getting vaccinated and avoiding chemicals like pesticides.

Do You Need a Reproductive Law Attorney?

If you want to expand your family through IVF, the law office of Cofsky & Zeidman encourages you to meet with an experienced lawyer. Donald Cofsky is a New Jersey adoption lawyer and a charter member of the American Academy of Assisted Reproductive Technology Attorneys. He has personally assisted more than 1,500 families, including cases involving IVF and surrogacy. To have him take a look at your situation, contact us online, or call our Haddonfield office at (856) 429-5005.

Some Information On Surrogacy Contracts

Some Information on Surrogacy Contracts

Surrogacy contracts, which are also known as gestational carrier agreements, are documents that define the rights and responsibilities of surrogate mothers and intended parents. These contracts are used for all gestational surrogacies in New Jersey, and fertility clinics will not perform surrogacy procedures unless a legally binding agreement is in place.

The New Jersey Gestational Carrier Agreement Act

New Jersey lawmakers passed the Gestational Carrier Agreement Act in 2018. Prior to this law’s passage, paid surrogacy arrangements were illegal in the Garden State. The law created strict requirements that all parties to a gestational surrogacy must meet. These requirements include:

  • The surrogate mother and intended parents must be represented by attorneys familiar with this area of the law.
  • The surrogate mother must be at least 21 years of age.
  • The surrogate mother must have given birth to at least one child before entering into the agreement.
  • The surrogate mother must undergo a thorough medical and psychological evaluation.
  • The intended parents must undergo a thorough psychological evaluation.
  • The agreement must state that the intended parents will accept custody of the child.
  • The agreement must state that the surrogate mother will allow the intended parents to accept custody of the child.

The intended parents who sign surrogacy agreements in New Jersey are usually married couples, but they do not have to be. The Gestational Carrier Agreement Act allows individuals and unmarried couples to enter into agreements with surrogate mothers, and same-sex couples have the same rights as opposite-sex couples.

Gestational and Traditional Surrogacy

The Gestational Carrier Agreement Act, which was revised in 2023, applies when the surrogate mother is compensated and undergoes in vitro fertilization procedures to become pregnant. The law does not apply when the surrogate mother’s own eggs are fertilized. Traditional surrogacies are legal in New Jersey, but the surrogate mother can only be compensated for her food, shelter and medical and counseling costs. The vast majority of surrogacies in New Jersey are gestational surrogacies.

The Importance of Qualified Legal Representation

New Jersey law requires surrogate mothers and intended parents to each be represented by a New Jersey adoption attorney when they enter into surrogacy contracts, but this would be advisable even if it were not a legal requirement. Qualified legal representation ensures that the agreement will be fair and legally enforceable and protect the rights of all parties involved. The entire process is far less stressful for intended parents and surrogate mothers when the negotiations are handled by lawyers. The provisions of a surrogacy contact should cover matters including:

  • The surrogate mother’s compensation and how that compensation will be modified if more than one egg is fertilized
  • The surrogate mother’s responsibility to maintain a healthy lifestyle during the pregnancy
  • Whether or not the intended parents will attend prenatal appointments and be present at the birth
  • The conditions that would necessitate the termination of the pregnancy

The Surrogacy Contract Procedure

Drafting a surrogacy contract should be a collaborative process. The initial draft of the contract is usually written by the attorney representing the intended parents and sent to the surrogate mother’s lawyer. The surrogate mother and her attorney will then discuss the terms of the agreement. If the surrogate mother is not happy with the agreement and proposes changes, her attorney and the intended parents’ attorney will negotiate until an agreement is reached that satisfies all parties.

Legal Advice and Representation for Intended Parents and Surrogates

If you are a New Jersey resident and plan to enter into a gestational surrogacy arrangement, you will need to abide by the provisions of the Gestational Carrier Agreement Act. This means that you will require the services of an experienced New Jersey adoption attorney. The law firm of Cofsky & Zeidman has over 25 years of experience in this area, and we are ready to answer any questions you have. You can call our Haddonfield office at (856) 429-5005, or you can use our online form to schedule a consultation.

The Different Costs Of Adoption

How Much Does Adoption Cost?

New Jersey adoption lawyers report that the typical cost of adoption in the state can be as much as $50,000 or more. For this reason, many people who want to add to their family in this manner believe that they simply cannot afford it. There are ways to achieve adoption even if one does not have thousands in the bank, however, and it often begins with finding a good attorney with extensive experience navigating the system.

Adoption Fees

There are three core types of adoption: foster adoption, domestic adoption and international adoption. Foster adoption involves the smallest amount of fees because the foster system covers most of the cost. Domestic adoption refers to adopting a child from the U.S. through an adoption agency. This will be more expensive, as there will be adoption agency fees involved. International adoption is, as the name implies, when you adopt a child from another country, typically through its foster care system. This will usually be more expensive than a domestic adoption because there will be both domestic and international fees.

Search Fees

If you want to adopt an infant, there will generally be search fees. These are paid to the adoption agency that matches you with a birth mother. If the agency is handling all aspects of the adoption, it will typically roll the fees into its overall fee. If you are pursuing an independent adoption, you will need to pay the consulting and advertising fees separately. Total fees often range from $3,000 to $7,000.

Birthing Parent Expenses

If adopting a newborn, you will be expected to cover the birthing mother’s expenses. That can include medical bills and some living expenses in addition to legal fees, travel expenses and counseling costs. This typically ranges from $6,000 to $8,000 for a private adoption.

Legal Fees

There is a lot that goes into an adoption, including filing court documents, negotiating with the birth mother and terminating the rights of the birth parent(s). What is often overlooked when it comes to legal fees is just how much money a good adoption attorney can save you overall.

Travel

Local adoptions usually have no significant travel costs associated with them. If adopting out of state, experts say travel costs can be around $3,000. If adopting internationally, experts suggest planning for between $6,000 and $9,000.

Home Study

Home study is required for all domestic adoptions in the U.S. The adopting parents must cover the costs for background checks, counseling and in-home observation.

Unexpected Adoption Fees

A common concern among people who want to adopt is unexpected fees that may come up suddenly when the process is already underway. Such fees generally only occur when dealing with people and organizations that do not have an ethical, child-centered approach. Avoiding this begins with choosing an experienced attorney who is going to have your best interests in mind. It is also important to deal with an established and reputable adoption agency. With this approach, you will know all the costs up front and not have to deal with any surprises.

Financing Adoption

While adoption can be expensive, there are ways to offset the burden. Those with limited budgets may want to consider fostering a child rather than adoption. It is often a significantly less expensive route and can even be free. There are adoption grants available in addition to the federal adoption tax credit. Active military personnel may be eligible for a one-time reimbursement. Many big companies offer employer-sponsored adoption programs as well. You should also speak with a New Jersey adoption lawyer or contact your local Social Services office to learn about local opportunities.

Would You Like to Adopt?

If you are interested in adoption, the law office of Cofsky & Zeidman would like to help. Attorney Donald Cofsky has personally helped more than 1,500 families adopt since joining the bar in 1974. To schedule an appointment, you can contact us online or call our Haddonfield office at (856) 429-5005 or our Woodbury office at (856) 845-2555.

Post-adoption Depression is Common

Post-Adoption Depression Affects Many Adoptive Parents

New Jersey adoption attorneys likely know that at least 10% of all adoptive parents will experience post-adoption depression (PAD). Some studies put the number much higher than that and at a rate even beyond what birth parents experience. Despite this, there is much less awareness about the issue, and it often takes adoptive parents by surprise.

What Is Post-Adoption Depression?

Postpartum depression (PPD) is a complex mixture of behavioral, emotional and physical changes that occurs in some parents after birth. It is often framed as a women’s problem, and while it occurs in women at a higher rate, PPD affects a great number of men as well. PAD is a very similar condition but one experienced by adoptive parents. There was at one point a stigma surrounding PPD. As a society, we had to break it down in order to increase awareness and support new parents. There are similar efforts underway for PPD. Adoptive parents who recognize their depression will often experience shame and other negative feelings that prevent them from getting the help they need.

PAD Takes Different Forms

Like PPD, PAD affects both women and men, and it manifests in many ways depending on the individual and on environmental factors. It can affect people who are in good health and have not grappled with mental conditions in the past. Common traits include anxiety, deep sadness and an inability to bond. Parents may also experience difficulty sleeping, which can exacerbate their PAD. The understanding of PAD among medical and mental health professions is still in its infancy. However, many experts believe that a leading cause is an emphasis on the child’s need to bond without an equal emphasis on the parent. Bonding is a dynamic process that does not occur overnight.

Preventing PAD

Awareness is an important first step. Many would-be parents adopt with no consideration that PAD is even a possibility. Experts recommend a mental health check prior to placement. It is important for every parent-to-be but particularly those that have experienced mental health challenges previously. Be honest with your doctor or therapist about what you have experienced in the past. Some adoption agencies are now requiring parents to identify professional and personal support individuals early in the process. Parents should attend counseling prior to the adoption process, during the adoption process and after it as well. Do not cease counseling just because you do not experience negative emotions right away. Continue until you have experienced the bonding and the family structure is firm.

Coping With PAD

Counseling will help with preparatory training and reading materials. Self-care is invaluable. A person must manage their stress, eat well, exercise regularly and set aside me time. If the PAD is severe, psychotherapy and medication may be necessary. Psychotherapy can include:

  • Interpersonal therapy
  • Nondirective counseling
  • Cognitive-behavioral therapy
  • Psychodynamic psychotherapy

Your therapist may also suggest a support group. It can be invaluable to socialize with people who are going through the same kind of emotional turmoil that you are.

PAD Affects the Entire Family

Experts also encourage adoptive parents to recognize that PAD is a condition that affects the entire family. If you have one parent who experiences PAD and another who does not, that other parent will be affected. It can result in negative mental health conditions in them, and they may need counseling and other support even though they are not experiencing the PAD directly. It can affect the children, particularly older children, as well. They can sense it and may feel responsible for it. A child can experience their own depression and may take on the burden of supporting the entire family.

Would You Like Professional Assistance With an Adoption?

A good adoption attorney does much more than handle the logistics and paperwork. The right attorney will help prepare you for what may come and direct you to the resources you need. At the Law Office of Cofsky & Zeidman, attorney Donald C. Cofsky has over 25 years of experience and has helped more than 1,500 families adopt. If you would like to discuss adoption with a New Jersey adoption attorney, call our main Haddonfield office at (856) 845-2555, or contact us online.

The Political Landscape of In Vitro Fertilization

In Vitro Fertilization and the Changing Political Landscape

Infertility affects millions of Americans who want to start a family. For many of these people, the path forward is an assisted reproductive technology (ART) technology, such as in vitro fertilization (IVF). IVF represents more than 99% of the ART procedures performed annually in the U.S., but the overturning of Roe v. Wade has cast doubt on whether these procedures are still legal.

What Is IVF?

IVF treatment involves a series of procedures through which pregnancy is possible. It is a treatment for infertility and also a means of preventing passing on negative genetic traits. The process involves fertilizing mature eggs with sperm in a lab. The fertilized eggs are then implanted in a female in the hopes of making her pregnant. That female may be the mother. It can also be a surrogate in cases where the mother would not be able to carry the baby to term.

Is IVF Legal?

While there are state laws that prohibit embryo research, there have historically been no state laws in the U.S. that forbid IVF. It is important to note that not all states have made IVF explicitly legal. This important particularly after the U.S. Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade. That allowed the triggering of state laws that were on the books but suppressed up until that point. None of those trigger laws prohibit IVF. Most were written long before IVF was a concept. However, many of them include language that may open the doors for IVF to be illegalized in those states.

The Anti-Abortion Factor

Research shows that the vast majority of Americans support IVF. Even among groups that are very conservative, support is high. Any legal ramifications to IVF have largely been collateral damage from the debate over reproductive rights at large. Republicans are broadly against abortion and fought to overturn Roe v. Wade ostensibly in order to revert rights to the state. In order to make abortion illegal, laws will often define personhood as starting at the point of conception. This is where it gets murky. Through that definition, a person is created at the moment the lab fertilizes the egg in an IVF procedure.

What Is the Debate Over IVF?

There is not much debate over IVF itself. Most Americans agree that IVF should be legal and want it protected. Among those who want abortion banned, there is concern over definitions and language. Could explicitly legalizing IVF create cracks in the laws prohibiting abortion? There are some, particularly religious conservatives, who argue that IVF is unnatural, but those people are a minority according to most major polls on the subject.

The Law to Protect Doctors

Alabama has been at the center of the IVF debate. It has some of the strictest anti-abortion laws on record. These laws include specific language, such as the destruction of extrauterine children constituting a wrongful death, that casts doubt on whether IVF is legal. The trigger laws even spurred some IVF clinics to stop operating. In response, however, Alabama’s majority-Republican state legislature passed a law that protected IVF. New Jersey adoption lawyers have noted that the law was not a perfect solution. IVF proponents argue it protects doctors too much from malpractice lawsuits and therefore puts families at greater risk.

Uncertainty for Families and Surrogates

As of 2024, there remains doubt for families in more than a dozen states. There are already fewer doctors in those states offering IVF treatment. The costs are going up, and the waiting lists are getting longer. There are also many families with embryos in storage that are unsure how to proceed. In Texas, for instance, there is fear that the state will make it illegal to destroy embryos in 2025.

Legal Advice and Representation for Families

If you live in New Jersey and are seeking to start a family through alternative means, the law firm of Cofsky & Zeidman is here to help. Donald Cofsky has many decades of experience as a New Jersey adoption lawyer as well as in ART and has helped more than 1,500 families achieve their goals. You can contact us online, or call our main office in Haddonfield at (856) 429-5005.

Some Information About Adopting a Stepchild

Adopting a Stepchild in New Jersey

When stepparents in New Jersey and around the country go through the formal adoption process, they establish secure and protected legal relationships with their stepchildren. This means that they have all the rights and responsibilities of biological parents. Adoption also ensures that all of the children in a blended family feel equal. An adopted stepchild has a right to inherit assets from their stepparent even if the latter dies intestate, and they also qualify to receive Social Security survivor benefits. There are many reasons to adopt a stepchild, but the process can be difficult.

New Jersey Adoption Laws

The law in New Jersey establishes several requirements that must be met before a stepchild adoption can be formalized. These requirements include:

  • The stepparent must be legally married to one of the stepchild’s biological parents.
  • The stepparent must be 18 years of age or older.
  • The stepparent must be at least 10 years older than the stepchild.
  • The noncustodial biological parent must either relinquish their parental rights or have had their parental rights terminated.
  • If the stepchild is 10 years of age or older, they must consent to the adoption.
  • If the stepchild is 10 years of age or older, they must attend the adoption hearing.

Obtaining Consent From the Noncustodial Biological Parent

Obtaining a noncustodial biological parent’s consent to adopt a stepchild is not always easy. Noncustodial biological parents are sometimes willing to provide consent because adoption will terminate their parental responsibilities, which means they will no longer be required to make child support payments. However, if the child’s biological parents went through a contentious divorce, consent may be withheld out of malice. In these situations, the court may decide that the noncustodial biological parent’s consent is not required.

The Best Interests of the Child Doctrine

When judges are called upon to make decisions in matters involving minor children, they follow what is known as the best interests of the child doctrine. In a stepchild adoption hearing, a judge may terminate a noncustodial biological parent’s parenting rights if they:

  • Cannot be located
  • Have abandoned the child
  • Have been convicted of child abuse or neglect
  • Engage in behavior like drug use that would place the child in jeopardy

A judge may also terminate a noncustodial biological parent’s parenting rights if none of these factors are present and if he or she believes that completing the adoption would benefit the child. Adoption hearings can be difficult for all of the parties involved, so it may be wise to have an experienced New Jersey adoption attorney advocating on your behalf if you plan to adopt a stepchild.

The Adoption background Check

Before a petition for adoption is granted in New Jersey, a background check is conducted on the adopting parent. The adopting parent’s state and federal criminal history is checked, and particular attention is paid to offenses involving children or drug or alcohol abuse. The approved agency that conducts the background check also gathers information about any domestic violence or child abuse incidents. Background checks are conducted to ensure that stepparents are fit and able to assume parenting responsibilities and provide judges with the information they need to make decisions that are in the best interests of the child.

Legal Assistance With New Jersey Adoptions

The legal process for adopting a stepchild in New Jersey can seem daunting, but the rules are necessary to protect children and parents. Cofsky & Zeidman has more than 25 years of experience in this area, and Donald Cofsky is one of New Jersey’s most respected adoption lawyers. If you would like to schedule a consultation in New Jersey to discuss adopting a stepchild, you can call our Haddonfield or Woodbury offices toll free on (856) 429-5005. You can also schedule a meeting with a New Jersey adoption attorney by completing our online form.

The New Jersey Safe Haven Infant Protection Act

How Does the New Jersey Safe Haven Infant Protection Act Work?

According to national statistics, incidents of child abandonment in public places rose by more than 60% in the 1990s. In 2007, New Jersey enacted a law to provide a safe and compassionate manner in which to relinquish a child. New Jersey adoption lawyers report that this law has saved the lives of at least 90 infants since then.

What Is Deemed to Be a Safe Haven?

The New Jersey law is designed to provide a safe haven for both the infant and the parent(s). There are women and couples, often young ones, who are confused, desperate and scared. Those emotions may lead them to rash decisions, such as leaving an infant in an unsafe place.

Rather than abandon the infant, they can bring the child to a safe haven. The baby must appear to be no more than 30 days old. No advance notice is required. The safe haven locations are available 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and a person can surrender a child with any:

  • Hospital
  • Ambulance
  • Fire station
  • Police station
  • Rescue squad

The Process Is Both Legal and Anonymous

The safe haven is not only available to parents; it is an option for anyone acting on their behalf as well. Furthermore, it is legal. There is no potential for charges against the parents or their advocates. It is also anonymous. No one has to provide any information at all. In fact, the law specifies that the person taking the baby in an official capacity cannot ask any questions. The law does ask that they provide an official questionnaire and that they stress that completing the questionnaire does not compromise anonymity or any of the legal protections. The staff may also offer medical treatment and social services as needed.

The Process Is Safe

The safe haven also gives parents and their advocates peace of mind. When you surrender a child in this manner, you do so knowing that the New Jersey Department of Children and Families (DCF) will take possession of the infant. The DCF will then take the necessary steps to place the child in a pre-adoptive or foster home.

Volunteered Information

The person dropping off the child can volunteer information, such as their name or the name of the child, but only if they choose to do so. The reason the law requires representatives not to request information is that a person gives up their right to anonymity when they provide these details. When that happens, the state is now compelled by law to search for the child’s relatives in the event they have parental rights or want to adopt.

Limits to the Legal Protection

There are limits to the legal protections that the law provides. If there is evidence of harm to the baby, the person acting in an official capacity is required to document it, seek medical treatment and involve the police. The police will then open an investigation. If, for instance, the police later determine that the person who surrendered the baby was responsible, that person would be charged and not have safe haven protection in that regard.

What If There Is a Change of Mind?

The law also established a reunification program. Anyone with parental rights to the child or who is related to the child and wants to regain or claim custody can. To do this, they can call the Safe Have Hotline at 1-877-839-2339. Note that there are limitations to how long you have to do this based on how far along the adoption process is. Parents and relatives will have at least 48 hours from the time that the infant was surrendered.

Do You Have Questions About Safe Haven Infant Protection?

Cofsky & Zeidman has many years of experience navigating adoptions and related matters in New Jersey as well as in the Philadelphia area. If you have questions concerning the Safe Haven law and your rights, we would like to help. To schedule a case review with a New Jersey adoption lawyer, call our Haddonfield office at (856) 429-5005, or contact us online.

DOD and VA To Expand Use Of IVF

DOD and VA Expand IVF Program Eligibility

According to the American Medical Association, infertility affects one in eight couples in the United States. Among active military and veterans, this number is even higher because of service-connected health conditions. The U.S. Department of Defense (DOD) and the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) had previously limited in vitro fertilization (IVF) to married, heterosexual couples, but New Jersey adoption attorneys note that those rules are changing in 2024.

In Vitro Fertilization

IVF involves a complex and personalized series of procedures that can lead to pregnancy. It is currently the most effective fertility treatment involving the direct handling of sperm and eggs or embryos.

DOD and VA IVF Programs

The DOD and VA established their IVF programs in 2017 as directed by a number of health-, military- and veteran-related acts that Congress passed in 2016 and 2017.

Criticisms of the DOD, VA IVF Programs

Since their inception, there have been two main criticisms of the DOD and VA IVF programs. One is that the DOD and VA limit access to military personnel and veterans who are infertile as a result of their military service. The other is that the agencies limit access to married, heterosexual couples using their own sperm and eggs or embryos.

Yale Law School and NOW Lawsuits

In August 2023, civil rights and veterans advocates sued the VA and DOD based on both criticisms. The groups involved were the:

  • New York City chapter of the National Organization for Women (NOW)
  • Yale Law School Veterans Legal Services Clinic
  • National Veterans Legal Services Program

The lawsuits were a partial success. Soon after they were filed, the DOD and VA agreed to end the marriage requirement and the ban on donor gametes. Both agencies, however, retained the requirement that infertility must be linked to a service-connected injury, illness, or disability.

Updates to the IVF Programs

The changes promised in August 2023 became official with both the DOD and VA in March 2024. Through the new policies, any military personnel or veteran with service-connected fertility now has access to the IVF program. Both agencies noted that there was pent-up demand and that they would begin enrolling newly eligible participants by the end of the month.

The newly eligible participants have access to all of the infertility-related services and benefits that had been available previously. These include:

  • Laboratory tests
  • Imaging services
  • Surgical correction
  • Hormone therapies
  • Vasectomy reversal
  • Fertility medications
  • Adoption reimbursement
  • Sperm retrieval techniques
  • Infertility assessments and counseling

Surrogacy

Under the current law, neither the DOD nor VA can cover surrogacy. The IVF procedure can include surrogacy, but the patients need to fund it out of pocket and oversee the logistics.

Potential for Future IVF Program Updates

Whether there will be additional lawsuits to push for further changes, such as including surrogacy and expanding the program to all infertile military personnel and veterans, remains to be seen. With or without additional lawsuits, such updates will likely require Congress to pass new laws that explicitly require these changes.

According to some experts, these new laws are possible. While infertility rates among military personnel and veterans are generally declining, demand for assisted reproduction is rising. In addition, the U.S. military has openly recognized that family building is a crucial aspect of happy service people who continue their careers with the armed forces.

Local Representation in New Jersey for Assisted Reproduction

The Law Office of Cofsky & Zeidman has decades of experience representing clients in New Jersey in matters of adoption and assisted reproduction. We appreciate the challenges you face and would like to help you make the best decisions for you and your family. To meet with a New Jersey adoption attorney, call our Haddonfield office at (856) 429-5005, our Woodbury office at (856) 845-2555, or contact us online.

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