It’s an unfortunate reality of life that, as an adopted parent, you can do everything right to raise a healthy and well-adjusted child, and your child may still struggle with issues specifically related to being adopted. Every person reacts differently to the circumstances in their lives and you simply can’t control how others, including your adopted child, will interpret events. Nonetheless, here are some typical long-term challenges faced by adoptees and some strategies for addressing them.
It’s not uncommon for an adopted child to hang on to feelings of grief—grief for their own loss of relationship with biological family members, and grief for their biological family’s loss. Many adopted children carry a long term challenge with sense of identity, particularly those who’ve had no contact with their biological parents. There are also self-esteem issues tied to a sense of abandonment, and there can be intense feelings of guilt when adopted children want to learn more about their biological parents.
Your Best Response
There is no one response that’s going to work with every adopted child, but here are some ways that you can build healthy emotional relationships with your adopted child:
- Empathize—try to put yourself in your child’s shoes, and understand how they might be feeling
- Be consistent—Your child will come to trust you more if you are predictable, and will be more willing to be open about challenges or problems
- Be there—As often as possible, be emotionally available for your child
- Don’t take things personally—Your child isn’t doing anything a biological child wouldn’t do
Contact Our Office
To set up an appointment, call us in Haddonfield at 856-429-5005 or in Woodbury at 856-845-2555. We can also be reached in Philadelphia at 215-563-2150 or by e-mail. For clients with personal injury or workers’ compensation claims, we offer a free initial consultation, and will represent you on a contingency basis, only charging attorney fees if we recover compensation for you.
Our offices are open weekdays between 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. Weekend and evening appointments may be arranged upon request. We will also come to your home or the hospital, if necessary.